Sunday, 14 July 2013

Fast Falls the eventide

Here I am once more  very late with my post ,Its taken ages to do this entry adding bits as I feel strong enough ,But you see on May 5th my very dear sister in law Dorothy died ,she had spent the Autumn last year, under going the most horific treatment for cancer,and it worked!!!.On the morning of May 5th Dot suffered a massive stroke ,she was taken to hospital,where the diagnosis was not good,as well as her husband Stan  her seven daughters ,and her son stayed with her all of that day ,being visited through the day by many of her Grandchildren ,The family kept us in touch,through out that long day ,Dot never really regained conciousness .At just after eleven o clock that Sunday evening,Dot passed away ,surrounded by her husband Stan and all her children ,When the phone rang ,and I received the news my heart broke.

Us in happier times .Dot is on the right ,Joyce another sister in law on the left
I know you have seen  this one before ,but we always had so much fun in each others company
And it looks as though Dot and Stan are enjoying themselves in this picture too.
And in this one taken at Stan's 80th  birthday party last September .
On the 31st of May Maurice took Jean my sister and I to The Heart of England Cramatoriam,in Nuneaton where we joined all the family and friends,
 If funerals can be called beautiful ,then this one was.
The Crematorim was packed and people were standing outside outside,a testament to how very much loved Dot was.Dots six son's in law carried her beautiful wicker coffin into the Crem'   .Dots eldest Granddaughter did a reading  ,and after the prayers, hymns and the eulogy,The service ended but the curtains didn't close so we could all file by and say our own goodbyes ...The girls had asked me could Dot rest her head on the cushion I had made for her ,of course I was honoured and not a little moved by that  request , and of course I agreed
Dot's eldest Daughter Julie asked me, if at her wake, I'd like to speak about her Mum .So as I close this very sad and poignant entry{It just had to be recorded though }I will leave you with the words I spoke for Dot ..
I first met Dorothy ,when I was 16 ,when I was courting her late Brother Mick , and when I got married to Mick she came with Julie to our wedding, Stan staying at home to look after the babies . Mick and I lived next door to Mum and Dad ,so it was exciting when Nana Roffe would get a letter to let us know Stan was bringing Dorothy and the children to visit ,often the visit was to introduce us to another little blonde haired baby girl ,until we got the red haired one and a boy at last ,I saw all those dear children grow up to be the super Adults, that Dot and Stan became so proud of .and as each one had their own family’s Dot would tell me all about her Grandchildren and then Great Grandchildren ,Dot loved each and every one, and each one was so special to  her.. Dot realised too that she has an amazing bunch of son’s in law,and you guys did her proud today   ….Dorothy’s  sisters Connie in Peterborough and Eileen in Canada ,are like me going to miss those telephone calls. Her Brothers Peter Vic and Dougie will miss her will their familys,I know my family are heartbroken to lose their dear Aunty Dot. Kate feels so blessed to have spent that last week, in Barwell at Stella’s ,she was able to spend lots of time with her Auntie Dot ,they had some quality time together ,and on the Sunday, Stan cooked lunch for them ,they washed up and laughed and chatted together
When my children were small Stan would fetch me and my little ones to stay with them, they were our holidays. And it was then I was told don’t call me Dorothy  …..and we were always made welcome quite where we all fitted in I’m not sure but we did…. obviously things were often tight but there was always lots to eat and endless love,I remember a whole box of cornflakes would disappear at breakfast time    .and their children would come and stay with us ….at Thornhaugh and Wansford and were a joy to  have, always so well behaved and eager to help me with my little ones ,Although one little girl who shall remain nameless… well it was Julie informed me she mustn’t be put to bed with wet hair because she would get a headache …
Dot we shared so much, over the years ,love ,laughter ,tears and fears, secrets , gossip,books ,knitting patterns, and shoes ,and once when Nana Roffe bought new fitted carpet, she couldn’t decide who should have her lovely big red carpet …so she cut it in half  bound the edge ,and we had half each ,It is these memory s and many more that are going to help me cope without you…. Dot always greeted me with a big hug and the words ‘I love you, you old bugger ‘ ..Dot I love you too  mate,Im gonna miss you so much.....
                                                As ever love Jan xx